arggghh..less than a month...are you kidding me??????I've lost my little baby yesterday....yes I lost my puppies last night(22/Feb/2011)...i'm so freaking sad right now.... arrgghh....Its like I lose my entire life because I already accept the welcome-ness of this puppies with a very big heart and I've consider he as family which close to me just like my own child.... OMG.. What is this feeling I felt right now.... Am I feeling guilty?? YES...I DO and I AM...totally....I felt so unpleasant because I still thinking about him...I miss him yet I know I just buried him this morning,I am mourning for him... I dont know if I am ready to just let it go this fast...I think I cant...Is this the meaning of true love....My heart cried but I didnt drop any tears yet...Im so pissed, how can he left me this fast as I just started to love him... how could he....Whose to blame... yes.. I do feel very guilty....I cant blame anyone....I am totally sad and I need some privacy right now.. I have to rethink what I've done wrong...oh..please GOD...but what can I do the best for him now is to let him go and pass by as I know he is walking to heaven now....heheh...yes...maybe...am I over-react or what? but still...I always remember him...duhh...so what if you call me sissy just the fact that I am so fragile about this... I dont care... I have the heart.... atleast I manage to confront this feeling and you know what...I feel a bit release...I watched his videos and pictures on the first week I took when I adopt him until he learn how to walk and run.....arrggghhh...It makes me sad....I feel my eyes got watering but the tears still didn't come.....am I too ego to just let my feeling out...?????? I dont want to attach any of his picture...because it makes me sad....arggh.....owhh...you know what, I forgot to mention how he died in sudden....it is because of his little brother...as I mention on the previous post... his lil bro did sucked my dog penis till it got swollen... yes... that was the part where I am Guilty As Charge (GAC), I didnt even try to separate them as I know they both will cry seeking for each other.....OMG...I didnt even know that he is in pain....So Sorry Puppies... Its my fault..I will take care your brother for you then since you were in heaven...please pinch me or bite me to wake me up from this nightmare....I hope it is...I wish I can turn back time...Doraemon....I need you.. JK
P/S text me when you have arrive ok...take care.... Loads of love from me....you were everything.... bye-bye..<3
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